A moment

I had a moment last night of actual excitement about the baby growing inside me.. the little rice size embryo that won't even have a beating heart for at least another few days.. picturing holding this baby in my arms, this living, crying baby, coming home to a celebration with balloons (not sure why the balloons were there?? I totally would NOT get balloons! haha) and it was such a lovely thought. But then of course, i wanted to smack myself in the head - 'snap out of it stupid! YOU don't even know if this baby is alive RIGHT NOW, let alone 8 months from now!' But then I want to smack the pessimist out of me.. I WILL bring a baby home!! ........ i hope...